The Emissary
by Olivia Robertson
Dated 28th August 2003
In Memoriam to Diana, Princess of Wales
At last a fountain commemorating the life and work of Diana is being unveiled in England six years after her tragic death. This has come about despite every sort of opposition. The best way I can express my own feelings and pay tribute is by a story – an Olympian one as suitable for royalty!
“There was an island that had once been very great and often bad, which now had lost greatness but also confidence. So the people decided, as they were no longer great, they would be good instead. Their Government enacted a system called 'Political Correctness,' which embodied all goodness. Anyone not politically correct was punished by ostracism.
However, the common people become more and more bored by having to pretend to be good. So they took refuge in gambling, illegal substances, shop-lifting, lots of scandal and above all, secret sex, which they still thought as wrongful activity, except when sanctioned by the Government. Their plight was piteous. They become envious of jollier countries, and were becoming a race of complainers dominated by the Righteous, who also had most of the money – as is usual.
The Olympian Gods in charge of the world conferred. Jupiter had a brilliant idea. Why not send an Emissary to stir up the islanders, some sort of demi-God like Bacchus?
‘They follow Him already,’ said Mars, Who enjoyed a good fight. ‘How about Erys, Goddess of discord? They are so complacent they will only go to war in self defence – and this from My own favourite island!’
Mercury declared: ‘They are grown used to Discord through their media. You can only give an effective “Wake-Up Call” through what the people most dread. I know these islanders. What they dread most is Love. How about sending Venus along?’
‘Her Power might provoke a world war,’ said Jupiter. ‘We want to keep a world in existence, even this one. How about what I did before? It worked then. I pride Myself that My love affair with Queen Leda brought about the glory of Greek culture. I propose we send Helen of Troy. That should sort out these islanders, She always does.’
Venus spoke. ‘Although Helen is My Emissary, she is not popular. She was the cause of the Trojan war and the fall of the city, the Trojan women were killed or enslaved. Helen landed up in her palace, her crown restored.’
‘Simple,’ said Mercury. ‘We’ll save the island’s women and kill Helen.’
And so it came about. And like Leda, her mother, who loved Jupiter as a swan, the new Helen is commemorated by a pool and a fountain for a task well done.”
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